Friday, July 3, 2009

Health plan won’t pay for anger management class? Buy the new video game Red Faction: Guerrilla!

Does your health insurance provider refuse to pay for a much-needed anger management class? Then consider purchasing the new third-person, open-world, action-shooter, destruction-based video game Red Faction: Guerrilla! Set on Mars in the year 2128, you'll assume the role of an ill-equipped insurgent fighter battling the oppressive Earth Defense Force (EDF). Yes, Red Faction: Guerrilla is a smart and economical way to relieve stress and anger caused by co-workers, friends, and family members. Immersed in a virtual world and the safety of your home, you won’t have to worry about unacceptable social behavior, legal and liability issues, or other potential consequences caused by real world outbursts of rage and hate.

Red Faction Guerrilla has only been on the market for about a month, but it is generating a tremendous buzz. Just read these genuine testimonials!

“Yesterday, in central London, a car sat in Covent Garden, filled with over 100 copies of Red Faction: Guerrilla, with a sledge hammer chained to it. Passers by were encouraged to ‘smash and grab’, to celebrate the release of the game, helping themselves to free copies of the game, with complete and utter disregard for law, public safety, or little else. A camera monitoring the vehicle captured ‘hundreds’ of passers-by taking out their anger on the vehicle, courtesy of the supplied sledge hammer. The stunt was pulled off by THQ's UK & Europe marketing team.”

“Decided to pick this up after enjoying the demo a little bit too much. Sand boxy game from the people that made Saints Row. Liberate Mars from the evil EDF by completing missions and blowing shit up. And it's the blowing shit up that makes this game worth noticing. The developer claims that the destruction in this game is ‘a generation ahead of the competition’ is remarkably justified and the whole game rests on the fact that things blow up as you would expect them to.”

“I got this yesterday and had some fun with it last night. I'm playing on normal difficulty and your right it can get hard real quickly! I had a mission to blow up an EDF building which tested my strategy to the limit. I failed after my 1st attempt at a sneaking mission so tried again ... failure. In a fit of anger I stole one of those big loader lorries aimed it at the enemy base and smashed all the way through the building resulting in total carnage and success!!”

“I'm playing it now, and MAN is it a great replacement for those Anger Management classes I got booted out of.”

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