Here’s my shortlist for musician, troll and horror film fan Rob Zombie’s unconfirmed remake of the 1968 Hollywood movie flop Mars Needs Women, which starred a dapper Tommy Kirk as a desperate Martian and a sexy Yvonne Craig as Dr. Marjorie Bolen, an expert on extra-terrestrial reproduction:Dr. Marjorie Bolen:
• Dr. Janice Bishop, chemist and planetary scientist, Principal Investigator for SETI Institute, expert on spectral behavior of organic Martian materials
• Rebecca K. Rowe, speculative fiction author and freelance writer, member of Mars Society and National Space Society
Artist abducted by Martians:
• Any one of the Guerrilla Girls
Homecoming queen abducted by Martians:
• Sheri Moon Zombie, Rob Zombie's wife
• Moon Unit Zappa, Frank Zappa's daughter
Airline stewardess abducted by Martians:
• Former astronaut Lisa Nowak
• Former U.S. Air Force officer Colleen Shipman
Stripper abducted by Martians:
• Patricia Kelly Elizabeth Podkayne Strickland-Garcia-Redmond
• Carmen Dula
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2 comments:
Well, even if it consists of nothing more than a naked Rob Zombie flatulating loudly and incoherently yelling "I'm Oingo Boingo!" for some reason, it's still pretty much gotta' be better than the original.
People tell me "Plan 9 From Outer Space" is the worst movie ever made. Uh-uh. Nope. Plan 9 is the worst *watchable* film. People want an example of an unwatchably bad flick? I point 'em at "Mars Needs Women."
How bad is it? About two years ago, I ended up getting rushed to the emergency room in the middle of the night, and, since it was an emergency, I sat pretty much ignored for several hours in a cold little room with a machine that went 'ping' and a TV was inexplicably showing "Women."
I *STILL* couldn't get through the whole thing
Agreed, Mars Needs Women is a horrible boring film. I kept waiting for something to happen, but it just ended. Considering Zombie's film-making skills, the remake will probably suck even more!
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